Friday, May 09, 2008 3:11 PM
In Recent Retarded News From 'the Front' ...
you just can't fix stoopid.
so as we were standing around waiting to come back from balad, our sergeants- looking for entertainment, start inspecting fatty's gear knowing there's bound to be something wrong with it. it was so jacked up that upon return to warhorse they decided a full inspection was in order. ..long story short- they found that fatty did NOT have his side plates -you know, the ones that stop the bullets from gittin' ya in the ribs- in his vest at all. uh-oh!! what a frigin' moron.
"so where are they?"
"oh, i put them in my duffel so i wouldn't have to carry them around."
they were PISSED. this almost came back on me -since he's retarded and i'm not, they expect me to square him away- but they figured this one was out of my control. how u gonna fix someone who's so lazy he doesn't even care enough to save his own life. if you want an extra demonstration, jab yourself in the side w/ your thumb. that stuff is SOFT shrapnel is NOT.
i don't know what else to say about that. they had him doing some form of push up until 1:30 in the morning. he puked at least once. i went to sleep.
yes, mother, i always wear my helmet.